Endangered Elves

A conversation between the kids this afternoon regarding my newfound need to conserve energy:

Ms. Diva said: “She’s acting like Louie the Lightbulb Bug `cept not as cute or nice.”
Mr. Smartypants said: “Worse! She’s like Algore on crack.”
Ms. Diva said: “What’s crack?”
Mr. Smartypants said: “It’s where your butt cheeks go together.”
Ms. Diva said: “Oh. What’s an Algore?
Mr. Smartypans: “He’s the weird guy from our state, who always wants you to send money to polar bears, save energy, and he was in that movie about how Santa is gonna die.”
Ms. Diva said: ” SANTA IS GONNA DIE?!”
Mr. Smartypants: “No, `cause Santa doesn’t really live where the polar bears live. He lives in China.”
Ms. Diva said: “Nuh-uh! He lives in the North Pole”
Mr. Smartypants whispered: “Nope, the elves make his toys in China and other places with weird names.”
Ms. Diva said: “How do you know?”
Mr. Smartypants snorts: “Duh! Learn to read, Dorkface! It says so on the boxes.”
Ms. Diva says: “What do Polar Bears do with money?”
Mr. Smartypants: “Buy sodas and freezers.”

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