Flashback to 1996

Dear Pops,

Remember 1996?

After the Presidential Elections, you accused me of voting for that “d@mned Clinton.” You had reason to be suspicious. I’d made no secret of the fact that Bob Dole scared me.  I’m not sure why.  Perhaps it was his annoying habit of referring to himself in third person or the fact he moved like an animatronic candidate created for the GOP by Dreamation.

Anyway,  do you remember how I may have somewhat implied in an indirect fashion that I voted for Independent candidate Ross Perot?  As I recall, you weren’t elated – since Perot siphoned just enough GOP votes from Dole to effectively hand the office to Clinton.  However, you said – as long as I hadn’t voted for Clinton, then you would not go on a cruise around the world with my portion of the family inheritance.

See, the thing is… um, I lied.

The reason I am telling you this is not because confession is cleansing for the soul but I’m thinking 2008  could be 1996 all over again.

See, we are facing this Huckaboom.  Now, I don’t think it’s all Chuck Norris’ fault – but he sure didn’t help.  Apparently, when “Walker Texas Ranger” talks, white Republicans listen.

Here’s my problem – as Governor of Arkansas, Huckabee did some questionable things: things of which I do not approve, things that would make your average Baptist stand up and scream: “That’s what Jesus would do?! Are you sure?”

I shudder to think of what he might screw up as President and blame on God.

Just look at this report from the NYT: (Yes, I realize all the folks at the NYT are all “biased liberal media b@st@rds” but still…)

DIKE, Iowa — He [Huckabee] came to town this week dressed in a dark pinstriped suit and cowboy boots, advocating lower taxes, death to the Internal Revenue Service and restoration of the words “Merry Christmas” and “Jesus Christ” to the American lexicon.

Pops, I simply cannot, in good conscience, vote for a man who wears cowboy boots with a pinstriped suit.

Bon Voyage and don’t forget your scopolamine patch for the sea sickness.


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